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More Blade Runner and changes to Star Wars – Please just leave it alone

Why can't films be original, rather than returning to worn-out franchises?

Rather than waiting 8 years for the story of Blade Runner to actually come to fruition, Ridley Scott will direct a prequel or sequel to the 1982 Sci-Fi classic. Then yesterday it was announced that George Lucas has made several changes to the Star Wars films for their new Blu-ray release. All this begs the question: Why can’t they just leave it alone?

Blade Runner, to anyone whose opinion matters, is perfect. Let’s leave it at that. While it has no sequels, it has influenced basically every Sci-Fi film since. Blade Runner did it all first, and did it all better. I accept that a new film in the franchise will probably be good, especially under the control of original director Scott (despite his last contribution to cinema being that pointless Robin Hood film, in which the only thing keeping the audience awake was playing a game of ‘Where will Russell Crowe‘s accent go next?’ Even if you win, which you can’t, you lose, because you’re still watching Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood). Nevertheless, a prequel or sequel will add little, if anything, to the original masterpiece, and it just feels like retreading old ground. At least Blade Runner, as a film, will remain intact.

The same cannot be said for the original Star Wars trilogy, which is being altered, for the worse. George Lucas is always changing his films. He’s like a small boy being told to stop playing with himself; he just can’t leave his stuff alone. And he’s a wanker.

There is one thing that has completely ruined my enjoyment of Star Wars, and that is the fact that Ewoks don’t blink. Until now. All my emails to George Lucas were not in vain, because finally, Ewoks now blink, and I can sleep soundly at night.

Remember the worst part of Revenge of the Sith? That ridiculous “Nooooo”? Remember how it completely ruined that film? Well Lucas has forcibly inserted that into Return of the Jedi.

The man is obviously obsessed with that “Nooooo,” yet seems incapable of saying it when the question is “can you please leave Star Wars alone now?” If Leonardo da Vinci came back from the dead his first thought wouldn’t be: “You know what the Mona Lisa needs? More aliens.” Though that would explain her curious smile. This obsession with reworking and remaking needs to stop. On principle, I won’t be going back to edit this post, perhaps unadvisadly. See, I spelt unadvisedly wrong. Am I going to go back to change it? “Nooooo.”

The problem with constant additions to these franchises is the lack of originality. Hollywood is becoming increasingly stale and decreasingly ambitious; this summer has seen a load of boring, more-of-the-same sequels such as The Hangover 2, Kung Fu Panda 2, Cars 2, Transformers 3, Pirates of the Carribean 4, Spy Kids 4Final Destination 5 and Harry Potter 93. We’ve also had remakes of Fright Night, Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark and Conan the Barbarian. Furthermore, the same film happened twice this year, in the forms of No Strings Attached and Friends With Benefits.

At their best, films take us in new, interesting directions and present us with original ideas. However, most films are now returns to franchises which have already been done to death, and these pieces of news about Blade Runner and Star Wars serve only to fuel an already backwards-moving industry. That’s why the most innovative work is now happening in television, rather than film. Anyway, let’s just hope it all stops before George Lucas decides to use CGI to replace every Star Wars character’s face with that of Jar Jar Binks.

Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

Categories: General, News

6 Responses to “More Blade Runner and changes to Star Wars – Please just leave it alone”

September 2, 2011 at 5:27 PM

If you’re a disgruntled Star Wars fan, please join us on the Facebook page where you can vent:


September 2, 2011 at 5:41 PM

Here’s a tip: Get the fuck over it.

September 4, 2011 at 8:17 PM

I don’t know … I go back and forth on this all fo the time. Not the changes that Lucas is making to Star Wars, because there’s generally no point to them … Neither, though, is there a point in getting worked up about them, because we’ve learned that that’s not going to change anything.

Where my indecision lies, is in this ideas of remakes and sequels. On some level, you can argue that anyone sticking, even loosely, to Cambellian hero-structure in their stories are remaking something that came before it. Just as it was the Matrix with my generation, Star Wars with my father’s, and Harry Potter with “kids these days.”

I also don’t mind these new takes on films. I love Red Dawn … Scariest damn movie I ever saw. In fact, we named our high school teams the Wolverines as an homage. And MGM has had a remake sitting in the can for a year now due to their financial woes. I’ve been desperately looking forward to this movie. Yes, its telling the same story, but with different writers and actors and directors. So, while it will be similar, it won’t be the same. And the fact that it is not original material won’t take anything away from the quality of the movie (Which isn’t to say that it won’t suck … If it does, I’ll be royally pissed).

Sticking with MGM for a moment, everyone loved the James Bond relaunch (Well, at least the first flick). The most “retread-ed” movie franchise of all time, and they managed to pull of a damn good movie.

You mentioned No Strings Attached and Friend with Benefits. If you’re a fan of romantic comedies (Which, if I’m taking a stab in the dark, Dan, I’m guessing they’re not your cup of tea) they were both pretty funny flicks. Similar in concept, but the fact that Portman got there first doesn’t mean that Kunis and Timberlake weren’t funny as hell.

In my opinion, movies at their best are supposed to keep us engaged and make us think and laugh and cry. The Matrix did those things for me (Except for the crying bit, natch), despite the fact that I’d seen a similar story before called A New Hope.

September 7, 2011 at 5:08 PM

The only Star Wars edit that actually bothered me was adding Hayden Christensen to the end of Return of the Jedi. It just seemed rather insulting toward the actor they digitally removed to splice him in.

Also because Hayden Christensen was terrible in the prequels and stunk up Revenge of the Sith long before that stupid “NOOOOO!”

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