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Desperate Housewives – You’re Gonna Love Tomorrow

ABC

ABC

(Season 5, Episode 1 – Season Premiere)

“In five years or 50, you will always be beautiful.” – Carlos to Gaby

It’s good to see the Housewives again, and fun seeing what’s happened in their lives during the five years that have passed since the end of last season. Much has changed, although one thing that hasn’t changed is their drop-dead gorgeous bodies. I don’t know ANY housewives who look like these women — even Gaby, who supposedly has gained weight and let herself go. I’m sure moms everywhere are wishing they could look half that good.

And speaking of Gaby, doesn’t it seem bizarre that she’d let her kid get so fat? She’s always been such a stickler about her own weight, being a model and all. Maybe she’s living out her fat fantasies through her kids. And making the kid run behind the car? A little sadistic, if you ask me!

The most touching scene of the night was between Gaby and Carlos (who, amazingly, are still together after all these years). She was lamenting her looks and saying she was glad Carlos was blind so he couldn’t see her. That’s when he said he could see her face every time he kissed her, and she would always be beautiful. Awww…

I was on the verge of thinking Mike must have left Susan a hefty life insurance policy, because she doesn’t appear to be working, her house looks fabulous, and she’s even having it painted (by a hot painter she’s bedding down, no less). But lo and behold, Mike walks in the door! Something tells me things aren’t quite over between those two. But he walked out on her because she didn’t think he mourned enough about the other two people in the car accident? I don’t get that. People have different ways of dealing with grief. Don’t these people know anything about sticking together through the tough times?

Lynette and Tom have plenty to deal with, having two 16-year-olds in the house — sex, drinking, gambling … some of those were even covered in tonight’s episode. Lynette is the housewife that most moms probably identify with, and it’s good to see her healthy and cancer-free.

Bree looks like something out of a Betty Crocker cookbook, and apparently, she and Andrew have made peace, since he’s managing her career. Somehow, though, I can’t envision Katherine as Bree’s kitchen slave. And the scene where Katherine pretends to sprain her wrist, forcing Bree to finish the spun-sugar recipe and then goof it up? Totally unbelievable. Bree would know that recipe inside and out, and has probably done it a million times.

Based on my own armchair psychoanalysis, I think Bree’s intense career path is the result of her trying to fill the void left by Danielle taking the baby — the baby Bree had intended to raise.

Regarding Edie and her new husband, not sure what to think about that. So he’s got some bottled-up rage he’s supposedly taking meds for, and apparently, there’s someone on Wisteria Lane who’s the target of that rage. Any speculations there?

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