Say what you will about ABC’s delightfully soapy sudser, but season eight of Desperate Housewives honestly hasn’t been half bad. I don’t know what this says about creator Marc Cherry, who hasn’t been present as a writer or executive producer this year, but each episode seems to be titillating with scandal, intrigue and just enough comedy. Although a bit tepid, last night’s installment wasn’t an exception.
Let’s start with Lynette, shall we? This woman just doesn’t seem to know what she wants. At the end of season seven, Lynette said she felt relief in regards to her separation. In fact, she even used Tom for sex in the season eight premiere. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Lynette still has the hots for her husband. After receiving a bouquet of flowers from him on their anniversary, Wisteria Lane’s resident control freak believed he wanted to fix their marriage. Alas, that ship has sailed, and after sneaking into his apartment to drop off a bottle of scotch, and subsequently hiding under the bed after Tom and Jane arrive for a round of lovemaking, Lynette discovered that Tom simply had a standing arrangement with the florist. Tragic.
I’m sorry, but I don’t feel an ounce of remorse for Lynette. She pushed Tom away. She emasculated him. As Renee pointed out last night, it’s time for her to move on. Let the man be happy. Am I wrong here? I don’t think so.
Speaking of happiness, Bree certainly hasn’t had much of it this season. She’s been nothing short of accommodating in this whole murder ordeal, and she doesn’t seem to be getting much help from her friends which is really ticking me off. Bree spends the episode being harassed by Chuck. It seems he’s taking a liking to stalking her. Jeez, Bree. First George, and now this psycho? Tsk, tsk.
Apparently, Chuck is very close to solving the case of Alejandro’s disappearance, and he’s even willing to bet that Bree is helping someone cover it up. After Susan’s dismal painting of the housewives burying Alejandro is chosen for display (without her knowledge), Bree and Gabrielle lend a hand by trying to buy the artwork off the shelves before someone starts putting two and two together. However, as luck would have it, Chuck followed Bree to the gallery, and seeing the painting just puts the icing on the cake.
Both Susan and Gaby abandon Bree, and in the final moments of the episode, she is seen returning to alcohol. If you’ll excuse me, I think I’d like to vent for a second. Why are the other housewives making Bree do everything? It’s common knowledge that Bree is a strong woman, but for heaven’s sake, that’s not her wicked stepfather buried in the woods! I understand the other housewives have their own respective problems, but if all of them agreed to keep the secret then I feel all of them should be going above and beyond to keep Alejandro under wraps … pun intended. Alright. I’m done. Let’s continue.
Gabrielle has become my least favorite housewife. In my opinion, she needs to woman-up and start aiding Bree. Granted that may be hard with an alcoholic husband. With Carlos suffering from a hangover, Gaby attempts to cover for him at the office. After trying to rectify a mistake involving a backstabbing employee, Gaby tells him off in front of a lucrative businessman that Carlos knows very well. In a twist, the businessman was once an alcoholic, and comes to visit Carlos in an effort to talk him to joining AA. This is certainly a step in the right direction.
So, with that being said and done, what do you guys think? The next episode of Desperate Housewives airs December 4, and that gives us plenty of time to ponder a few questions. Will Lynette finally move on? Lord knows I hope so. Will Bree succumb to alcoholism again? Will Carlos get a grip on his? Is Chuck on some kind of medication? And more importantly, will Renee get another storyline of her own? Feel free to sound off in the comments below!
Jaylen Christie is a journalist, actor, humorist and devoted advocate of the unappreciated superhero Aquaman, who really enjoys expanding upon a versatile resume. By day, he’s a kindhearted technology writer for a web hosting company, and by night, he is a fanatical television junkie with a love of quality programming and fizzy Mountain Dew. He’s also working on a series of comedic novels that will be … EPIC!
Clacked by Guest Clacker
on Nov 14, 2011 @ 13:51 EST5EDT
I think this was a good summary of the Desperate Housewives. Although I am a devoted fan, sad to say, I’ve missed a few episode and this articles has caught me up to speed. Thanks Jaylen for the clear and concise overview. ButI’m going to have to disagree with you.
Lynette has carried the weight on her shoulders since the beginning of time. Do you remember when she was so fed up she drove off on the boys (Penny was only a baby) or what about the time when Tom wanted to be 21 again, relive those years in fantasy since his high school experience was, umm, a bit uncool for lack of better words. She’s fed up but she missed her man, her rock, the peanut butter to her jelly. Tom and Lynette are MADE for each other. Tom can do away with little Ms. Rebound and gracefully return home.
Bree, she’s been through too much to allow alcohol get the best of her…again. …this too shall pass.
Gabby, blah. I’ll be the first to say I’ve always liked her better when she was broke, Carlos was blind and her daughter didn’t know she wasn’t a Solis! Ouch. Excuse me for a minute my over just beeped, I think Gabby’s slice of humble pie is ready.
Renee, never been my cup of tea, never will. RIP Edie, I guess it’s true you never know what you have until it’s gone. At least I would tolerate the hoish activities and the disrespect to Ms. McClusky but Renee superficialness makes me want to vomit. Go back where to you came from!
Katie.
PS. Jaylen, your mini biography is simply hilarious. Thank you again.
Thanks for taking this on because I have just run out of things to say about the show. I was over Tom and Lynette last season and was hoping they’d both move on this year but it’s been a chore not bitching about them week in and week out. I only perked up this week during the painting/art gallery parts of the show, and enjoyed the wonderful Leslie Jordan’s guest appearance. His scenes made me laugh out loud! He certainly had all the best lines. And poor Vanessa Williams has been wasted since she joined the show. I hope she gets something juicy to sink her teeth into after the show ends.
You are very welcome, Chuck. The show has changed considerably since the first season, but I don’t think this year has been half bad. However, I do honestly agree with you about Lynette and Tom. It’s just too much. I don’t know what to think of them anymore.
Leslie Jordan was hilarious! He’ll be back in the next episode too. In regards to Vanessa Williams, I do think the writers are honestly trying to keep her busy. She’s had three solid concurrent storylines so far this season, and they do keep her involved with Lynette. I’d like to see her interacting with Susan, Gabrielle and Bree a bit more though. But let’s not pretend as though she’s the first character to be wasted. Katherine in season five comes to mind. The good news is that Vanessa just signed a talent development deal with ABC, so after Desperate Housewives ends, she’ll be getting her very own show!