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In a world in which Christina Hendricks exists, I don’t understand Carrie Mulligan

I recently watched 'Drive,' and was completely confounded by the lack of action between Ryan Gosling and Christina Hendricks. I felt foresaken.

Since February has been officially recognized as Ryan Gosling month, it seemed as though a viewing of Drive was in order. I had somehow missed this in theaters, so I was thrilled when I was able to Redbox it on Friday night. These are the things that I knew about Drive going into it:

  • Baby Goose
  • Scorpion jacket
  • Christina Hendricks

Honestly, besides those three things, I’m not sure what else any movie ever needs.

So based on this knowledge of Drive, I assumed that it would be Gosling driving bad guys around at high speeds while making out with Christina Hendricks and probably taking both of their shirts off. I got my popcorn and my wine all ready and settled in for two hours of watching two of the hottest people on earth get it on. Instead, what did I get? Beshitted Carrie Mulligan!

Look, I’m sure Mulligan is a lovely girl who was amazing in An Education and Wall Street: Disco Never Dies, or whatever the shit that movie was. However, in a film in which Christina Hendricks exists, why in the name of Rachel McAdams is Ryan Gosling making puppy dog eyes at Carrie Mulligan?

Granted, the style of the film was very quiet and restrained (punctuated by bursts of extreme violence), so the fact that she often faded into the background isn’t entirely a reflection on her. However, a film in which Mulligan flits around like a poor-man’s Michelle Williams and gets both Ryan Gosling and an attractive ex-con husband while Christina Hendricks gets slapped around while wearing an unflattering outfit all before SPOILER ALERT getting her head blown off, doesn’t make a goddamn bit of sense to me.

You had Joan Holloway under contract and you made her wear a ponytail and look bored? That’s like having Harry Potter over to your house and just making him use his magic to take the trash out. Not a damn person takes their shirt off in Drive, and that’s just a wasted opportunity of the highest order.

I am not a crackpot.

Photo Credit: Sheryl Nields/Esquire

Categories: DVDs, Features, General, News

One Response to “In a world in which Christina Hendricks exists, I don’t understand Carrie Mulligan”

February 14, 2012 at 4:52 PM

It’s funny that you say that – it was my opinion that the Driver wasn’t really capable of much in the way of romance or even communication due to some handicap – but in any event, the director said he initially wanted a porn star for that role, but they couldn’t act well enough. And then Christina Hendricks asked about the part, and of course she got it. Considering the concept of the character, it seemed to me that she was intended as a waste of beauty (spoiler: after what happened to her, you know?).

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