VH1
Yesterday was a weird day for me. Sometimes, when I’m waiting for someone to get ready (hi, Honey) or some show to come on or whatever, I’ll flip on the tube. We have satellite service with DVR and record lots of shows on lots of different channels, so I never really know what will be on when it powers up. Usually, I’ll quickly go into the DVR menu and queue up something I want to watch, or start flipping around. But sometimes I just sit there … and watch … and ask myself “Why the hell are you watching this?” It happened twice yesterday.
The first time, I know why I was watching. When the TV came on, there was American Idol’s Nikki McKibbon looking like shit, sprawled across the bed. And then in walked Dr. Drew Pinsky. I’d WhyTheHellAmIWatchinged an episode or two of the first season, sticking around because, as a huge fan of Babylon 5, I was mesmerized at what a mess Jeff Conaway had become (I know he was on Taxi first, but I liked B5 better!). The next scene was Gary Busey talking with Dr. Drew, insisting that he was there to help and that he wasn’t a patient. How could this not be awesome!
Then Jeff Conaway wheeled along to whine at his girlfriend through a door and, man, are these people a mess. Why do we enjoy watching other people’s fucked up lives? But what kept me glued to the screen was Busey. The man is apeshit fucking insane, and Dr. Drew knows it.
I was a little surprised that Gary allowed them to bring in a shrink to analyze him, revealing that he has no filter between what his brain thinks and what he says and does. That’s fancy talk for apeshit fucking insane. Poor Gary is going to get some medication that may slow him down and make him a little more normal. At that point, it was too depressing to watch any more. Gary sane? What’s this world coming to?
Later, I found myself doing it again. Scream Queens is that new reality competition show where girls are vying to be in Saw VI. They have to scream, act out scenes, meet casting directors and scream some more. Now, I’ve watched a lot of reality shows and I know how women can be on them, but these bitches were awful! Calling each other ugly and stupid, it’s a wonder they didn’t just start clawing each others’ eyes out.
I found myself trapped when the girls had to run off to get dressed real quick to meet a casting director. They then had to try and make a good first impression. What a bunch of pretentious pieces of crap. I was also mesmerized by trying to identify judge Shawnee Smith, who I’m very ashamed to admit I remembered her for her role in Ted Danson’s Becker more than from her Saw films role.
By this point, I figured I might as well see who wins immunity before moving on with my life, but they got me. The person I’ve selected is … Commercial Break! And I waited. I waited in real time through real commercials to find out who was safe. And right now I have no idea who that was. I’m so ashamed.
Clacked by Jason Hughes 
on Nov 02, 2008 @ 19:00 EST5EDT
How can you not remember her as Linda?
I mean as if Saw was better than Becker. pah!
I’m slightly ashamed to admit that I have my DVR set to record Scream Queens. However, I love horror movies and I used to watch the teen-interest show that one of the contestants was on back in the day, so I guess I have better reason than most. That said, I don’t watch the Saw franchise because its basically just torture porn to me, so I had to look up who Shawnee Smith was…not just because I don’t watch the Saw movies, but also because she’s so wooden on Scream Queens that I found it hard to believe she’s a successful actress.
If you’re watching the most recent ep, it was the hot Asian chick who got sent home. Its a shame she couldn’t even choke out some semblance of emotion or acting, because she was really amazing looking.