I couldn’t help but use this image from last week’s True Blood of Lafayette’s ‘visit’ to the office at Fangtasia, as the scene, and the quote, was probably the funniest moment on television this week. He has got to be one of the most quotable characters on the air today; I’m sure he’ll continue to show up in this column week after week.
“So if I’ve got even a ‘Jew at an Al-Qaeda Pep rally’ shot at getting my black ass up out of this mother fucker, I’m taking it.”
– Lafayette
“When it comes to men, I’ve got a long history of putting the cart so far out in front that the horse can’t see it, so now I”m just trying to get it right.”
– Tara
“… If I’m going to be upset with you when you’re wrong, the least I can do is stand up for you when you are right.”
– Brenda
“To the educated eye, a prison tat tells a story: where you did time, why you did time, and who you did it with. It’s a little like a job resumé for criminals.”
– Mike
From the Virgin Diaries
“I thought about being an actor back in the ’70s. But I think I really just wanted to be Steve McQueen. There is a difference.”
– Mick
“‘Mi casa es su casa'; That’s Spanish by the way … (whispered to Beth) For keep her out of my stuff.”
– Mick
“You must be all the talk at the Holy Water cooler.”
– House
“I blamed God. I hated him for ruining my life. But then I realized something … You can’t be angry with God and not believe in at the same time. No one can. Not even you, Dr. House.”
– Sister Mary Augustine
“Husband described her as being unusually irritable lately … I didn’t realize a woman could be unusually irritable.”
– House, providing a quote I know will get me in trouble
“You were curious, like a eight year old boy with a puzzle that’s just a little too grown up for him to figure out.” – Cameron
“To-MAY-to, To-MA-to” – House
“You do not want to start today with me, Paco.” – Logan
“Are you sure? It was in my day planner under ‘Goals.'” – Weevil
“So you guys are like Mulder and Scully or something, and the X-Files are real?” – Jamie, guest bimbo
“No, the X-Files is a TV show; this is real.” – Dean
“Witches, man — they’re so friggin’ skeevy.” – Dean
“I know a few Iranians who are coming into town.” – Fiona
“Oh, let’s avoid people who use “Michael Westen” and “jihad” in the same sentence.” – Mike
“The art of turning someone into a double agent is delicate. The target has to be put into a fragile psychological state.” – Mike’s voice over
“Get this crazy bitch away from me!” – Lucio, while Fiona points a taser at him
“Fortunately, fragile psychological states are a specialty of Fiona’s.” – Mike’s voiceover
“I told one lie, I had one drink.” – Buffy
“Yes, and you were very nearly devoured by a giant demon snake. The words “let that be a lesson” are a tad redundant at this juncture.” – Giles
Clacked by Ivey West 
on Jun 28, 2009 @ 14:00 EST5EDT
