Tara: All I can do right now is quote the chick in “Poltergeist” — “What’s HAPPENING??” I am so freaked out by this weirdness.
Michael: I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: Can anyone explain this phenomenon to me? It’s like I almost want to go out and buy one of these things as a scientific experiment … but I might hate myself in the morning.
Tara: I can’t explain it. How do they simulate fake ribs? Do they have Heidi Montag‘s surgeon behind this?
Michael: *snort* Holy Crap! We’re done! Done I say! That’s it folks! Hope you enjoyed the show! Tip your waitresses! Next time … try the veal! Thank you! Good night!
Tara: I admit, that comment was one of my finest hours. But wait! We’re not done yet. Show them the picture of the McRib cut in half….
Michael: No! Someone will kill themselves! That’s cruel! Inhuman! Insane! You club seals for fun … don’t you?
Tara: Cut the drama and show it. If people are going to eat this gunk, they should see it.
Michael: Hokay … here you go. I hope you’re happy. You know … we’re going to lose readers when they click that link, right?
Tara: I see it as a public service.
Michael: What? Are you goofy? What do you mean “public service” … ?!? How … ???
Tara: Well, I think it’s there for a limited time only for a reason. Perhaps a government conspiracy to thin the herd? Heh. Although … I do enjoy the Shamrock Shake, so what do I know?
Michael: What … ?!?! The government runs McCrappage? No wonder their burgers are … something other than burgers….
Tara: Hey it’s just a theory. Don’t spread it around.
Michael: But here’s the deal: That Portugese commercial? (I think it’s Portugese) The process they’re constructing a McRib by? It looks so robotic! The sauce looks watered down or something. And that fried pork patty? Not appetizing … !!!
Tara: I’d rather have a knitting needle poked in my eye repeatedly.
Michael: Let’s not get carried away; it’s only a sammich … that you’ll never eat….
Tara: True … but they say you can get pretty euphoric by eating one. Check out these people:
Michael: And, you know, I can understand that … but not over a McRib sammich.
Tara: You know what? This CommercialClack is making me as nauseous as the Tilt-A-Whirl at the school carnival in seventh grade. I need to get off this ride.
Michael: I know what will make you feel better: A McRib.
Tara: I’m not loving it.
Clacked by Tara Shrodes
on Nov 05, 2010 @ 15:00 EST5EDT
My son and I both make noises of intense regurgitation when the commercial comes on for this atrocity to human consumption.
Didja ever see “Fried Green Tomatoes?” Yeah, scary to think what’s in that sauce and processed meat goo
One more thing:
Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!!!!!!
LOL. Is it wrong of me to say I’d eat Soylent Green before I’d eat another McRib?
I tried one once. ONCE!
As you can see from the video of the people supposedly happily eating that terminal torpedo of tastelessness, there’s so much barbeque sauce/flavored paint on the things that the first bite causes a good half pint of that sludge to come squirting out everywhere. As I recall from that traumatic moment when I tried one, all you could taste is the sludge, which is probably a good thing. When I think of the “rib” part of this I picture it being made by marching hogs right into a wood chipper which feeds into some evil machine that forms the pig puree into that thing they call ribs.
Well, at least now I won’t be wanting any dinner. Chalk up one good thing to come from “Satan’s Sammich”.
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Tara?
Based on Tom’s comment, I’d say our work here is done …
Yes, you did a good job. I couldn’t get the foodfacts link to work, but maybe that’s a blessing I should count and forget about that link.
Now that I’ve lost even more of my mind I had this idea. I think the writers of “The Walking Dead” should make the McRib the source of the zombie virus. The way I look at it, if you would willingly eat a McRib you’d eat anything, just like a zombie. So the logical progression is McRib turns people into zombies who then think their neighbors look like a limited-time sammich, they get bit, turn into zombies. Repeat.
There…now you know the origin of the zombie outbreak. Sorry for the spoiler.
Yummmm, after a peanut butter & banana sammich, McRib rates, well it doesn’t rate. But I’ll bet Elvis loved him some McRib action!
All I think of is the Hess truck commercials…
The Hess Truck is back, better than ever for Christmas this year the Hess _____ is here!
Now I think…
The McRib is back, as shitty as ever. For Thanksgiving this year the McRip is here!
I refuse to eat one because the one sided “Rib markings” makes it look like a car drove over it. So I just assume its roadkill and lose my appetite.
Hm… two things
a) that surgeon is dead so I don’t get the joke (I guess she got ribs removed, right?)
b) the McRib is available all the time over here. It has been for about 20 years. I like it. Don’t get what the whole fuss is about :-)
The McRib in the USA is only released 6 weeks a year, but only at a few selected stores. For some reason this “sandwich” has a following and there are apps that track where it’s released so people can drive 1,000 miles to buy 3 dozen.
This year it’s being released in all of the USA stores for 6 weeks,that’s the first time since 1994.
. . . . .
And therein lies the mystery, Oreo …
Ah I get it. So for you guys it’s like a cult following of some kind of perversion :-)
I think it’s funny that people here in the comments and in general find it so appalling with the artifical look of it and the strange taste when I can tell the story of my and my brother’s visit to Texas where we drove from Dallas to Houston and stopped at some kind of chicken frying fast food joint. My brother bought fried chicken pieces for about 20 bucks. We ate a bit, were full… and after five minutes started eating again. And stopped. And started eating again. Then my brother told me that ALL the employees in that place were grossly overweight. He said “Like, fat you have never seen before in your life. People twice as big as anyone you have ever seen”.
We arrived in Houston and my brother brought the stuff up to our room where we put it in the minifridge. And guess what: he ate more of it. And still there was some of it left. Because I didn’t allow myself to eat any more. It clearly had additives in it that made it addictive, more than anything that I ever ate back home. And guess what – the next morning when we woke up my brother went straight to the fridge again. At that time I chose to pick the stuff from his greasy fingers, go outside to the hall and throw it down the garbage disposal.
Again, the McRib is just a meat patty pressed into a rip-like form just every single Chicken McNugget. I find this bruhaha very strange compared to MY story :-)
“… the McRib is just a meat patty…”
Are you SURE it’s meat? Hmm? ;o)
A formed ground pork patty, barbecue sauce, onions, and pickles served on a 6 inch (15.2 cm) roll. The patty is precooked, frozen and later reheated. Yum, precooked, frozen and later reheated…
Yeah you DO know that ALL patties are precooked and frozen, right?
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Tom:
You might have something there … because I’ve seen some real characters in the throes of their unstoppable pursuit to acquire a McRib at any cost … and they are somewhat zombie-like.
Somewhat zombie-like in that they will stop at nothing when there’s that McRibby prize awaiting them at the end of the rainbow.
Somewhat zombie-like in that many commit that ‘zombie shuffle’ on their way through the doors of their local McDonald’s.
I mean, take a look at that second video above: They are definitely zombie-like if you watch them eat. And if you freeze the scenes mid-bite, you can certainly picture just about each and every one adorned in undead makeup, sure ringers for undead extras! And the dripping sauce gives things an oh, so realistic bent, too.
It’s kinda eerie, isn’t it?
Definitely eerie and I have a McDonalds less than a mile from my home. That means either we’re going to be some of the first victims or I need to make sure my guns are in working order. I’m going with the latter.
I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM OF THE WALKING McRIB DEAD!
Not only does the realization of what a McRib is, stop me, but the fact that there are pickles sends me the other way. Pickles belong on hamburgers or sticks, eaten alone as a complete meal. You just can’t put pickles on pork. wrong, wrong, wrong. The chain Chic-fil-a puts pickles on their chicken sandwiches, in fact, the only garnishment with the classic Chick-fil-a is a pickle.
Don’t even get me started with putting cheese on pork and chicken…
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<—— has successfully worked a McRib article into a relevant offering in this morning's staff meeting at work
. . . . .
This is sooooooooooooo much better …
https://www.saveur.com/article/Recipes/Make-Your-Own-McRib-Bigger-Better-and-Always-Available