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White Collar – Is the FBI that hard up for a gig?

I never made the connection when she appeared as the boss on 'Criminal Minds', but doesn’t Jayne Atkinson’s (Helen) managerial style remind you of an awful cross between Patty Hewes and Miranda Priestly?

- Season 3, Episode 3 - "Deadline"

Weird case-of-the-week on last night’s episode of White Collar. An investigative journalist’s life is threatened, and the white collar division of the FBI is called in to protect her. Ignoring whether or not jurisdiction makes sense, it was an unusual instance where the heavy lifting was done by someone other than Peter or Neal (or even Mozzie).

Which isn’t to say that Diana didn’t do a great job. And I thoroughly enjoyed the jokes about her utilizing a Manchester accent … considering the fact that Marsha Thomason’s from Manchester. But it wasn’t Diana whose work was unappealing. No, that prize belonged to Jayne Atkinson as Helen, the really annoying journalist whose life was in danger.

While Atkinson was sending off plenty of her Erin Strauss vibes from Criminal Minds, I couldn’t help but feel as if she was channeling both Patty Hewes (Glenn Close) from Damages and Miranda Priestly (Meryl Streep) from The Devil Wears Prada … not a good thing. And while her refusal of protection was meant to read as purity in her pursuit of the truth, safety be damned, it instead landed like some bad reading of a typed statement.

And really, the stereotypical boss from hell for Diana? As a result, Helen’s offer of employment at the end of the episode couldn’t have been more hollow and futile. There was a lot that could have been done with the story that was wasted, or, worse yet, not even attempted.

Meanwhile, the investigation of the bad pharmaceutical company lacked the usual pop of a White Collar case. There were some cool moments — splitting the piece of paper in two, for one — but it didn’t feel as if very much effort had been put into making the case interesting. I do wonder, however, if the location of the secret meeting with the source was the same as the one used in 25th Hour on Monty Brogan’s (Edward Norton) final morning of freedom. Because that’s kind of cool.

The significant others story? Meeting Diana’s girlfriend Christie (Moran Atias) was a nice peak into her life. In fact, it seemed like a large part of this episode was specifically meant to boost Diana’s exposure. However, and I say this as a fan of hers, who cares? Granted that introducing Christie was, in part, a result of Neal’s attempt to steal the U-boat manifest before it could be whisked to Washington, but I couldn’t help but feel a bit like I do when Kalinda’s sexuality — or “lack thereof” — is flaunted in our faces on The Good Wife. Was the double date necessary, or was part of it the sensationalism of Diana and Christie together? If the latter … isn’t White Collar better than that?

And speaking of Christie’s scenes, two things: 1) Sara (Hilarie Burton) still needs to go far away. And 2) Get over the U-boat! Vincent Adler (Andrew McCarthy) was an awesome introduction into the lore of the show, and I absolutely love the significance he played — and continues to play — in Neal’s (and Mozzie’s) life. But by now we’ve run so far afield, just like we did chasing down the mystery of who killed Kate (and worse there’s a connection between the two). Enough is enough … let Mozzie and Neal get their ultimate revenge on Adler and make their grand exit a different way, because the art thing is stupid.

On a separate note, I usually don’t watch the “scenes from next week” at the end of a show, but I was slow to cut it off last night. Long story short, make sure you don’t miss tales from Mozzie’s past!

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Photo Credit: USA Network

3 Responses to “White Collar – Is the FBI that hard up for a gig?”

June 22, 2011 at 10:44 PM

Watching last night it felt like the kind of forced expansion of character (in this case, Diana’s significant other) that precedes a “shocking death” storyline.

June 24, 2011 at 11:49 AM

Peter rattled off a line about Helen’s editor or publisher being a friend of Hughes or the Director, which made this Peter’s case. It’s a sign of how quickly the show has lost my interest that I don’t have exact recall of the specifics. Without that connection, wouldn’t the matter have remained with the NYPD and not involved the FBI at all?

I love hearing actors’ native accents, but was bemused to find I could barely notice the difference. With other Brits like Hugh Laurie or Michelle Ryan, the change in voice is much more pronounced.

I wish that Neal hadn’t been able to finagle the details of Diana’s activities out of Christie so easily. For me, the character was a bust, as anticipation had been built up since she had been mentioned several times over the past few seasons, but withheld from our sight until now. At first, I just found her forgettable, then a bit gullible for playing into Neal’s hands within a few hours. It was bad enough when he did the exact same thing with Matthews last week.

Being a tertiary character connected only to a secondary one, I doubt Christie’s in any danger of a sudden death, as the audience has only just barely connected with her.

Of course, if we hadn’t gotten the dinner party, Diana would have laid out Mozzie on his ass when he tried to switch the briefcase. I noticed that she put the extremely important payload between her feet, and not at her side, when Neal handed her her scarf, and feel confident that she was good enough to catch the pass.

I actually like Sara, but much more when she and Neal were sparring as professional rivals. Now that they’re involved, it does nothing for me, even though I don’t care with whom he ends up.

The entire U-boat storyline has rankled from the beginning. Even though this is the kind of show where they can give us a throwaway line about Neal and Mozzie being certain that a billion dollar collection with a sketchy provenance was entirely looted from German-occupied museums, and not one item was taken from Holocaust victims whose descendants are still suing to recover their inheritances in the present day, it’s felt dirty to me. Also, I was fine with Neal, Mozzie, June, and June’s granddaughter deceiving and scamming Peter, Elizabeth, Diana, and Jones when it was in pursuit of Kate, or Fowler, or the intellectual challenge of the music box, or Adler, but when it’s just about two crooks trying to keep more money than they could ever possibly use, I lose any and all sympathy for them. I’m actually glad when they screw up and panic.

And really, a live webcam feed of their score so they can smugly revel in self-satisfaction? In what world is that a good idea rather than something that can connect them to the theft?

June 28, 2011 at 3:31 PM

I could see an argument being made for the FBI to investigate the case, as a favor or whatever, but I can’t see how FBI agents would get roped into protection detail no matter what the circumstance. And the NYPD would be my preference regardless.

Funny, I didn’t even see Christie being as substantial as you did, and that’s not saying much. I had no recollection of her existence until she was suddenly there, so I didn’t even feel like she’d been someone who’d had any anticipation built about her. I still think it was all about the sensationalism.

Maybe it’s a NY thing, but I saw Diana sticking the briefcase between her feet as just what you do in NY. It’s instinct, so I didn’t take it as a sign that she was even aware that Neal was playing at something. But you could be right there.

I hear what you’re saying about Mozzie and Neal’s scam, but I have to imagine that, for them to be realistic characters at all, they have to have a grand exit to this game. Actually, I think the mistake’s been that it hasn’t been a topic of conversation since the show premiered. Neal has to be looking for that final score, the one he can retire on forever. That’s what the dream is, right? Otherwise, we’d have to believe that he plans to start working a 9-5 once his sentence is over … don’t think so! :)

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