Law & Order wrap-up: When nerds attack and compromising positions

Law & Order (Season 19, Episode 9)

Quite honestly, I think the last two seasons of Law & Order have been some of the best in the series. Ever since McCoy became the D.A. and Jeremy Sisto and Linus Roache joined the cast as Lupo and Cutter, it has been on an upswing. As much as I loved Ed Green, Anthony Anderson as Bernard has been another welcome addition to the cast. So I enjoyed this episode — especially when it looked like Lupo and Cutter were going to fight each other. I’m not going to lie — it was kind of hot.

Lawyers get a bad rap in general, but this show in particular shows them as noble creatures fighting for the greater good. However, the lawyer in this episode? Not so much. He’s representing dozens of families in a class-action lawsuit, for which he will receive over a hundred million dollars if he wins. So, you know, it only makes sense that he would go the extra mile.

I really found it kind of inherently funny that Winston just kills people when things don’t go his way. He mentioned at the beginning of the episode that he lives alone. I don’t doubt it. I also don’t doubt that his home is littered with the bodies of those who dared get in his way, or eat his peanut butter, or not take out the trash.

Some items of note:

• How is it that Lupo sweet-talking the lady cop into giving them information gets the case thrown out, but Cutter’s whole, “but he let me smoke in his office!” was totally okay?
• Seriously. How awesome was Lupo’s “what did you say to me?” to Cutter? I loved how he started to walk out the door like he was going to let Cutter’s comment go, but then changed his mind and got in his face.
• Since Winston has a very colorful history of killing the people who get in the way of his money, why weren’t Cutter and everyone else involved in this case concerned about their own safety? That seemed weird to me.
• The fact that Cutter almost got shot to death while his wang was out is one of the funniest things that has ever happened on Law & Order.
• You guys, Mercedes Ruehl is from Queens. Why was she trying to do a southern accent? Can she please stop? It was horrifying.

Law & Order SVU: (Season 10, Episode 12)

It looks like we have one of Law & Order‘s favorite cases: that of a young girl leading a double life that involves  either promiscuity or out and out prostitution. We open up with a dead girl who has been fished out of the Hudson river. She’s been beaten and stabbed, but shows signs of old injuries, including multiple cigarette burns. Everybody who watches SVU knows that that means child hooker.

However, it quickly turns out that the young girl in question isn’t selling herself for concert tickets or new clothes or whatever; she’s a math prodigy. This means that this episode is basically “when nerds attack.” Do you remember when you were in high school and everything seemed like such a big deal? Well, apparently when you’re hopped up on narcolepsy drugs and stay up for six days straight, everything becomes a really big deal… and you end up stabbing your prep school roommate in the chest and throwing her off a ferry.

Some items of note:

• I got really excited when Olivia had to go undercover as a madame, although it was a bit of a let-down. She wore some weird fur coat, but other than that, it was just Olivia talking about buying girls. Even though she told the pimp she was from Chicago, she didn’t even bother to put on a Chicago accent. Come on Liv; when you go undercover, we want to see something fun!
• The girl who played Jessica, the murderer, looks exactly like a young Mila Kunis to me. So much so, that I looked her up on IMDb to make sure she wasn’t her little sister (fun fact: like the dead girl in this episode, Mila Kunis emigrated from the Ukraine). She’s not, but she is on Lipstick Jungle.
• I watched this while wrapped up in a blanket on my couch, but watching Jennifer just made me want to be lazier. There’s something about hyper-competitive people that just makes me sleepy.

Clacked by Kona Gallagher
on Jan 16, 2009 @ 10:00 EST5EDT